Ah yes, another day at home for the public school children. Election day means that the kids are home with me for the day. No big deal right, they both slept in, and had a leisurely breakfast... I am getting a lot of work done...day is going great. As I head out to move vehicles around the driveway, my youngest comes running to me crying that he has a "rush burn" on his hand. Hum.. well go wash it off I say. So he goes in the house, and I follow a few minutes later to see that it is more than a "rush burn" it is a thumb pad with a hunk of skin missing from it... So as I am showing a great deal of empathy and sympathy for my young yellow headed dwarf, (which anyone who knows me well, knows that these are not areas of great strength for me) I catch a whiff of something akin to smoke... like wood fire smoke... like fresh air and smoke mixed together.
I say to Bashful... were you lighting something outside, trying to burn it? Eyes wide open, shocked that I would accuse him of such a thing... he says emphatically "NO!!" Sniff, sniff, sniff... sure thing it is smoke that I smell. "Bashful, can you please tell me what you are doing outside?" "NOTHING!!"
"Well, maybe I was trying to light some leaves on fire, in my fort, with a lighter that Happy gave me."
There you have it, push too hard and the answers are always there... just not always the answers that make us happy - so it really seems that Happy has a lighter supplier, and he is getting the lighters from school and passing them on to his 9 year old brother... just for kicks and giggles!
Can you make this stuff up? Maybe if you have a lot of time on your hands!
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
Oh that boy! (Written by Happy's Teacher, today's guest blogger)
True story... again you just can't make this stuff up!
So after lunch during quiet time I hear a female student yell out, Happy you're bleeding!! I look at Happy and say, oh my word, you are bleeding!" Happy looks at me with no concern and lies his head on his desk in the pool of blood... I ask him to come up to my desk and he asks why. I look at him as the blood is dripping from his nose all over the floor and down his chin. He walks up to my desk and begins to bleed all over my desk. I point out the blood on his hands and he proceeds to lick the blood off his palms. I ask him what he thinks he should do and he says, "sit back down?" I say, "ummm noooo, do you think you should go see the nurse" and he looks at me puzzled and says, "why would I need to do that?" I say, "well you are bleeding all over the place". Still unconvinced that he is experiencing anything less than normalcy, I shake my head, laugh to myself, and write him a pass...
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Gather up the children for a quick trip to the church...
So, as always there is background to the story -here is the background - my dwarfs do not listen - we have gotten to the place in their lives where they are smarter than I am and know far more than I...
Couple of days ago - Happy was cleaning the van - he had out the vacuum and the Windex, and he spent hours cleaning the inside of the van. Now remember this is a 15 passenger van that on any given day could supply a small third world country with enough food and water, to feed at least one meal of great nutritional value along with clothe most of their children and some of the adults (if they were prone to wearing clothing).
While this occupied his time for hours - and there was a small amount of progress made - Happy was thrilled to be entertained, jamming to the radio and working, working, working. (Keep in mind a few things - he asked permission to do this task, even though it was not on any to do list for the week, and he had assistance setting himself up, ie the extension cord, the radio in the vehicle on, trash bag for trash, hamper for items to come into the house.)
Yesterday it was a beautiful day. Happy figured that he would jump in where he left off the day prior with the van cleaning. Opened up the doors, got out the vacuum, Windex, paper towels, cranked up the music and that is how I found him about an hour after he came home from school - like father like son, in his cleaning glory!
I popped my head into the van and asked what he was up to, to which he caught me up to speed on the fact that the van did not get finished the day before , so he was going to finish it today. Fine I say, but please turn off the vehicle. I am not sure that you know how to turn it on without draining the battery. Why yes I do, stupid mother, his body language says to me. His real language insisting that he knows what he is doing, it is not "science rocket mom"! I say again that I would just feel better if her were to turn off the vehicle. In response he begins to move towards the front of the vehicle in what I thought was a compliant response to my request to him, and now I know wrongly so, as I thought he was going to turn off the ignition and radio.
Fast forward to this morning. Pouring down rain. 6 dwarfs loaded in the van to go the church for the work day - hop in, I the great Queen of this land, already in an agitated state because none of them could manage to get moving today in a timely fashion, and place the keys in the ignition, while instructing the dwarfs to quiet down and buckle up.
Go to throw the van in reverse and something seems off... it's not on. Hum turn the key in the ignition again - nothing - no juice - no power - no puttering - NOTHING - the battery is not only drained - it is dead!
So we fly into action, because we are already 10 minutes behind schedule, jumper cables out of the garage - the female dwarfs and I move the car closer to the van - the eldest male dwarf googles the correct procedure for jumping a car, because again as the mom I KNOW NOTHING! Did I mention that it was raining ? Did I mention that Happy, knowing he is in hot water wants to talk his way out of this situation and try to say that it was not his fault that the van won't start? Did I mention that the youngest dwarf was in the midst of an hour long meltdown? Did I mention it was raining? All the while I am being second guessed, by Sneezy &Dopey.
I start to instruct the dwarfs in the fine art of jumping a vehicle as Dopey repeats after viewing, the steps out loud from the UTube Video that he uploaded on his Ipod....just in case or because(not sure which) I KNOW NOTHING!
Well sadly, I wish there were a happy ending to this story - That the dwarfs and I were able to restore life to the van, but doing it my way - which was correct- and the Utube video way yielded nothing, so there is one big white 15 passenger van sitting in the driveway with no go go juice ...
We will wait for the Prince to ride in on his white stallion (or Chevy pick up) to save the day! Lucky for us we have no where else to go as a large group today!
Couple of days ago - Happy was cleaning the van - he had out the vacuum and the Windex, and he spent hours cleaning the inside of the van. Now remember this is a 15 passenger van that on any given day could supply a small third world country with enough food and water, to feed at least one meal of great nutritional value along with clothe most of their children and some of the adults (if they were prone to wearing clothing).
While this occupied his time for hours - and there was a small amount of progress made - Happy was thrilled to be entertained, jamming to the radio and working, working, working. (Keep in mind a few things - he asked permission to do this task, even though it was not on any to do list for the week, and he had assistance setting himself up, ie the extension cord, the radio in the vehicle on, trash bag for trash, hamper for items to come into the house.)
Yesterday it was a beautiful day. Happy figured that he would jump in where he left off the day prior with the van cleaning. Opened up the doors, got out the vacuum, Windex, paper towels, cranked up the music and that is how I found him about an hour after he came home from school - like father like son, in his cleaning glory!
I popped my head into the van and asked what he was up to, to which he caught me up to speed on the fact that the van did not get finished the day before , so he was going to finish it today. Fine I say, but please turn off the vehicle. I am not sure that you know how to turn it on without draining the battery. Why yes I do, stupid mother, his body language says to me. His real language insisting that he knows what he is doing, it is not "science rocket mom"! I say again that I would just feel better if her were to turn off the vehicle. In response he begins to move towards the front of the vehicle in what I thought was a compliant response to my request to him, and now I know wrongly so, as I thought he was going to turn off the ignition and radio.
Fast forward to this morning. Pouring down rain. 6 dwarfs loaded in the van to go the church for the work day - hop in, I the great Queen of this land, already in an agitated state because none of them could manage to get moving today in a timely fashion, and place the keys in the ignition, while instructing the dwarfs to quiet down and buckle up.
Go to throw the van in reverse and something seems off... it's not on. Hum turn the key in the ignition again - nothing - no juice - no power - no puttering - NOTHING - the battery is not only drained - it is dead!
So we fly into action, because we are already 10 minutes behind schedule, jumper cables out of the garage - the female dwarfs and I move the car closer to the van - the eldest male dwarf googles the correct procedure for jumping a car, because again as the mom I KNOW NOTHING! Did I mention that it was raining ? Did I mention that Happy, knowing he is in hot water wants to talk his way out of this situation and try to say that it was not his fault that the van won't start? Did I mention that the youngest dwarf was in the midst of an hour long meltdown? Did I mention it was raining? All the while I am being second guessed, by Sneezy &Dopey.
I start to instruct the dwarfs in the fine art of jumping a vehicle as Dopey repeats after viewing, the steps out loud from the UTube Video that he uploaded on his Ipod....just in case or because(not sure which) I KNOW NOTHING!
Well sadly, I wish there were a happy ending to this story - That the dwarfs and I were able to restore life to the van, but doing it my way - which was correct- and the Utube video way yielded nothing, so there is one big white 15 passenger van sitting in the driveway with no go go juice ...
We will wait for the Prince to ride in on his white stallion (or Chevy pick up) to save the day! Lucky for us we have no where else to go as a large group today!
Friday, January 27, 2012
There is a lot to be said for laughter vs anger...
Really there is... however it was not until later that I actually was laughing. As many of you know, I have a small business that helps families prepare meals in advance for their families to help take the stress out of dinner time. While typically getting ready for the class is not stressful, this past week getting ready, getting through it and getting home were a tad bit overwhelming for even I a seasoned mother of many!
Each week one of my dwarfs will ask if they can accompany me to class. I believe that it is not so much because they like working with me, but because they like to be able to select dinner from anything in the whole grocery store that we work out of. This week, on Sunday Dopey asks me to accompany me, for this I am grateful because he has become a strong young man and his brawn will come in handy. So Monday he confirms that he is still in, and Tuesday at 4 off we go...
Things area going well, and Dopey heads over to select his dinner... $15 later, dinner is served, yes just for him, I am not having dinner because we are running a bit behind schedule. We begin to prepare the area for class and suddenly there is a crash... I see Dopey standing and staring at the floor where a green bag is lying, with soy sauce and glass amidst the heap. I say "let's get this cleaned up." to which he begins removing everything from the bag, glass shards include - at this point I see disaster, so I say, just take the whole thing to the trash. And he does... leaving in his wake a trail of soy sauce the distance from the accident site to the trash can (which incidentally the can has wheels and could have been moved to the site of the accident), however I digress, now we have another mess to attend to - which puts us about 20 more minutes behind. I am now in the hole for the evening by $15 for dinner, $1.69 for soy sauce, and $1.00 for a recycle bag that was tossed in the disaster and about 30 minutes. I now explain to him that we must make up lost time that we are behind, he seems remorseful, and attempts to pick up the pace. We get set for class right on time.(even though I like to be done in advance so that early arrivals can start early) and I thank him for his efforts.
So you are thinking - what is the big deal - so far so good - be flexible ... and I am. The best is yet to come - part way into the evening there is a customer that needs a can opened and because the can is bent Dopey takes it to the back of the store and used an industrial can opener on it, but even with that is still not able to get the entire top off - so I tell him to set the can on the counter and we will pry open the lid. As I am saying this to the boy- I am also saying, as is the customer - "please be careful that you don't cut... ""Ah.. Mom, I cut myself".
Now, any of you that know me also know I can't do blood. I am not capable of it, but there is no one to assist me. I tell Dopey go to the sink and I start foraging for a band aide. (Note to self, business needs a first aid kit ). Find two in the back - (have I stated that customers are needing assistance?) I am sure that I look like a woman on the brink right now... and go to the sink where Dopey is washing and ask him on a scale of 1 -10 how bad is it - he says " a 7 -- it hurts really bad... and it looks pretty deep." "Look", I say, "I can't do anything - dry off your hand, lets slap these band aides on, and then your dad can look at it when we get home." "Wear a glove," I tell him for the remainder of the night - and get back to work... all the time thinking when this is over I am going to have to take him to the ER for stitches.
Okay so the rest of the evening progresses, slowly --- but finally we are done - the items are ready to be packed in the van and I am ready to check out and pay. I pull the van to the curb, put on the four ways, get out and start to go into the store to tell Dopey to load the cart, take it to the van, load the van and then wait for me in the van after returning the cart to the cart lot.
I am at the register paying and said Dwarf is upon me with a soda in hand and a pleading look in his eyes, so add another $1.49 to the tab for the boy for the night and I send him out to the car with my purse and his soda and tell him I will be right there and we will go home and have his dad look at his finger, which is now on a scale of 1-10 a 5.
"Funny story," I say. "I need to go, can't talk the keys are locked in the van and the van is running... "
Now this is where the story is a bit tricky. See for about three weeks the spare set of van keys are missing, and while I have searched high and low for them in the house - in jacket pockets in my purse, I can not find them. I am anticipating the Prince blowing a gasket now because, if I had not lost the keys, then he could just run to the store and rescue us. He did a fine job of controlling his anger with me and was even able to walk me through calling for roadside assistance.
"Hello, Roadside Assistance." "Yes, I am outside my van with the keys locked inside and the van is running can you send someone to assist me?" To which the long and the short of it is this, they were able to come out inside 40 minutes to open the lock (it took longer for them to drive to me than to open the doors) and Dopey and I were on our way, however, we did sit in the cold air for 30 minutes waiting for them to arrive. Dopey is now shivering - teeth are chattering - and he is saying things like, "Mom the van is mocking us." "Boy am I glad we are not sleeping on the streets tonight." All while guzzling his soda... and the amount of money that he is costing me is increasing as I see the fumes from the van burning through my $3.59 a gallon gas... and the potential of an ER run upon arriving home whenever that may be.
At last safely on our way, we arrive home and unload and we recount the story to those we love and we all get a good laugh. However the funniest part of the story is this...
Wednesday the Prince left me a message saying that he found the spare van keys on the floor of the van. We chuckle because that means both sets of keys were locked in the van and the locksmith needed to come regardless... but the funniest part is that at lunch yesterday I asked the Prince where in the van he found the keys, to which he responded under the drivers seat.
DRAMATIC PAUSE, under the drivers seat ???? Wait a minute... I turn to the Prince and say, " I think you owe me an apology... because it seems that I did not loose the van keys after all. Three weeks ago when we had the van into the shop, and had to pick it up after hours, you used my set of keys to drive it home and the spare set were under the drivers seat the whole time, because that is where the guys at the shop put them before they lock up the van....
Really, you can't make this stuff up...
Each week one of my dwarfs will ask if they can accompany me to class. I believe that it is not so much because they like working with me, but because they like to be able to select dinner from anything in the whole grocery store that we work out of. This week, on Sunday Dopey asks me to accompany me, for this I am grateful because he has become a strong young man and his brawn will come in handy. So Monday he confirms that he is still in, and Tuesday at 4 off we go...
Things area going well, and Dopey heads over to select his dinner... $15 later, dinner is served, yes just for him, I am not having dinner because we are running a bit behind schedule. We begin to prepare the area for class and suddenly there is a crash... I see Dopey standing and staring at the floor where a green bag is lying, with soy sauce and glass amidst the heap. I say "let's get this cleaned up." to which he begins removing everything from the bag, glass shards include - at this point I see disaster, so I say, just take the whole thing to the trash. And he does... leaving in his wake a trail of soy sauce the distance from the accident site to the trash can (which incidentally the can has wheels and could have been moved to the site of the accident), however I digress, now we have another mess to attend to - which puts us about 20 more minutes behind. I am now in the hole for the evening by $15 for dinner, $1.69 for soy sauce, and $1.00 for a recycle bag that was tossed in the disaster and about 30 minutes. I now explain to him that we must make up lost time that we are behind, he seems remorseful, and attempts to pick up the pace. We get set for class right on time.(even though I like to be done in advance so that early arrivals can start early) and I thank him for his efforts.
So you are thinking - what is the big deal - so far so good - be flexible ... and I am. The best is yet to come - part way into the evening there is a customer that needs a can opened and because the can is bent Dopey takes it to the back of the store and used an industrial can opener on it, but even with that is still not able to get the entire top off - so I tell him to set the can on the counter and we will pry open the lid. As I am saying this to the boy- I am also saying, as is the customer - "please be careful that you don't cut... ""Ah.. Mom, I cut myself".
Now, any of you that know me also know I can't do blood. I am not capable of it, but there is no one to assist me. I tell Dopey go to the sink and I start foraging for a band aide. (Note to self, business needs a first aid kit ). Find two in the back - (have I stated that customers are needing assistance?) I am sure that I look like a woman on the brink right now... and go to the sink where Dopey is washing and ask him on a scale of 1 -10 how bad is it - he says " a 7 -- it hurts really bad... and it looks pretty deep." "Look", I say, "I can't do anything - dry off your hand, lets slap these band aides on, and then your dad can look at it when we get home." "Wear a glove," I tell him for the remainder of the night - and get back to work... all the time thinking when this is over I am going to have to take him to the ER for stitches.
Okay so the rest of the evening progresses, slowly --- but finally we are done - the items are ready to be packed in the van and I am ready to check out and pay. I pull the van to the curb, put on the four ways, get out and start to go into the store to tell Dopey to load the cart, take it to the van, load the van and then wait for me in the van after returning the cart to the cart lot.
I am at the register paying and said Dwarf is upon me with a soda in hand and a pleading look in his eyes, so add another $1.49 to the tab for the boy for the night and I send him out to the car with my purse and his soda and tell him I will be right there and we will go home and have his dad look at his finger, which is now on a scale of 1-10 a 5.
"Funny story," I say. "I need to go, can't talk the keys are locked in the van and the van is running... "
Now this is where the story is a bit tricky. See for about three weeks the spare set of van keys are missing, and while I have searched high and low for them in the house - in jacket pockets in my purse, I can not find them. I am anticipating the Prince blowing a gasket now because, if I had not lost the keys, then he could just run to the store and rescue us. He did a fine job of controlling his anger with me and was even able to walk me through calling for roadside assistance.
"Hello, Roadside Assistance." "Yes, I am outside my van with the keys locked inside and the van is running can you send someone to assist me?" To which the long and the short of it is this, they were able to come out inside 40 minutes to open the lock (it took longer for them to drive to me than to open the doors) and Dopey and I were on our way, however, we did sit in the cold air for 30 minutes waiting for them to arrive. Dopey is now shivering - teeth are chattering - and he is saying things like, "Mom the van is mocking us." "Boy am I glad we are not sleeping on the streets tonight." All while guzzling his soda... and the amount of money that he is costing me is increasing as I see the fumes from the van burning through my $3.59 a gallon gas... and the potential of an ER run upon arriving home whenever that may be.
At last safely on our way, we arrive home and unload and we recount the story to those we love and we all get a good laugh. However the funniest part of the story is this...
Wednesday the Prince left me a message saying that he found the spare van keys on the floor of the van. We chuckle because that means both sets of keys were locked in the van and the locksmith needed to come regardless... but the funniest part is that at lunch yesterday I asked the Prince where in the van he found the keys, to which he responded under the drivers seat.
DRAMATIC PAUSE, under the drivers seat ???? Wait a minute... I turn to the Prince and say, " I think you owe me an apology... because it seems that I did not loose the van keys after all. Three weeks ago when we had the van into the shop, and had to pick it up after hours, you used my set of keys to drive it home and the spare set were under the drivers seat the whole time, because that is where the guys at the shop put them before they lock up the van....
Really, you can't make this stuff up...
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Wishing you a Happy New Year
2011 has been an eventful, joy filled, tear filled, busy, crazy year of growth, love and grace!
We are so grateful to each of you, for keeping us grounded, sane and focused on the tasks at hand. Without each of you and your individual roles as family members, church members, friends, neighbors, acquaintances and yes even some strangers along the way, for sure our lives would be less fulfilled, less colorful, and very very ordinary!
We have had many highs during the past year, and in my estimation, the greatest would be getting away for a whole week with my husband, the Prince, as we celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary. We spent a wonderful, relaxing week in Florida... basking in the sun, each other's company, and peace and quiet!
But other things that ranked high on the list include in no particular order...
May you and your family be blessed as we enter into this new year, relax in the knowledge that trials are to grow, us not break us, that opportunities to serve others before ourselves are available at every turn in the road. If you are reading this, know that you and your families are loved and cherished by us.
Happy New Year !!
We are so grateful to each of you, for keeping us grounded, sane and focused on the tasks at hand. Without each of you and your individual roles as family members, church members, friends, neighbors, acquaintances and yes even some strangers along the way, for sure our lives would be less fulfilled, less colorful, and very very ordinary!
We have had many highs during the past year, and in my estimation, the greatest would be getting away for a whole week with my husband, the Prince, as we celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary. We spent a wonderful, relaxing week in Florida... basking in the sun, each other's company, and peace and quiet!
But other things that ranked high on the list include in no particular order...
- the graduation of our eldest dwarf from high school
- a fantastic visit from our dear friends from Florida
- finding a wonderful facility for Grumpy to attend to work out some struggles
- continuing my business, growing it and finding many new friends on the way
- the growth of the Prince's ministry in our church and to our community
- a visit from our favorite Spanish daughter
- the return of our favorite Korean dwarf
- Doc having the opportunity to travel to Spain
- the addition of Lola and Lucy - our black and yellow (Steeler's puppies)
- the time we had with a special 10 year old Korean dwarf
- camping with the family and with friends
- spending time at the pool relaxing in the summer
- the joy of giving
- the joy of sharing Christ's love with others
- the start of Kids Hope USA at our church
- the love and support of our friends and family
- Bashful's first basketball season
- God's provisions - for just what we need
May you and your family be blessed as we enter into this new year, relax in the knowledge that trials are to grow, us not break us, that opportunities to serve others before ourselves are available at every turn in the road. If you are reading this, know that you and your families are loved and cherished by us.
Happy New Year !!
The Dwarf and the Axe !
This entry will go back a few weeks...but I believe that it is a story that I will remember for a long time, along with all Happy's bus mates, his teacher and his classmates!
Happy's morning routine is typically carried out in SLOW motion. On this particular school day though he was up and out of bed, before his alarm went off, he was dressed and moved quickly through his breakfast and chores... certainly atypical of this young dwarf.
As several of the other dwarfs and I are sitting at the breakfast table, we realize that suddenly our tongues and our mouths are tasting odd, and that there is an odd, strong, almost sickening odor coming from somewhere in the house. This scent is flavoring what we are eating and drinking as we are inhaling it through out noses...
I hop up from the table and go to the stairs, I call up to Happy, the only dwarf up there, " Hey Happy, you okay??" "Yea mom, I am okay." But his voice is not coming from his room, or his bathroom... so I begin to head up the stairs. As my foot hits the third stair, my nostrils are assaulted by another blast of the smell. Immediately my head starts to hurt, my tongue is thicker and my nose is burning. By the time I reach the landing and call out to Happy again, I feel as if I may pass out.
I figure by following the sounds of humming, that Happy is camped out in my bathroom, and as I round the corner to the master bedroom to the master bath, I run into a fog screen from an aerosol can.
" Happy, have you been spraying your father's Axe body spray?", I ask as I have my face buried into the crook of my arm. "No mom he says." "Really???" , I reply, I can taste it, I am struggling to breathe in this space...I am going to ask you once more and I would like you to tell me the truth."
So, yes indeed I repeat the question. Now perhaps he is not hearing me correctly since now my eyes are watering and my nose and mouth are still buried in the crook of my arm, but would you believe, standing there in the fog of Axe, he continues to deny that he used the Prince's cologne.
Now let me just say right now, I FIRMLY believe that teenage boys should take responsibility for their hygiene. Pit music is a must! and Cologne would be fine, in appropriate doses and with the permission and consent of a parent. Furthermore, I have a big problem with my son's smelling like my husband, that in my mind is just weird...
But I digress, I ask him for the third time to tell me the truth please, as I point out the obvious ways that I KNOW he has illegally used the Prince's body spray, and yes three times is the charm because he says that he did use it. Did I mention that all the while his is nonchalantly combing his hair????
Now here is the quandary - I glance at the clock... it is now time for him to leave for the bus, if he stays to shower this all off, he will miss the bus and be late for school because I will not be able to take him in until the last dwarf gets on the bus at 8:30 .... so ... I have no choice but to send him off in a hurry, now to catch the bus.
Little did I realize that this was the day of the return of his favorite teacher who had been out for a few weeks on leave. Was Happy trying to impress her being a well dressed, groomed and fine smelling young man? We will never know - but I guarantee that day everyone smelled him before they saw him, had to clear their throats in his presence without clearly understanding why, and maybe suffered from a mild headache that cleared once they got out into the fresh air....
This all happened before 7 am ... you just can't make this stuff up!
Happy's morning routine is typically carried out in SLOW motion. On this particular school day though he was up and out of bed, before his alarm went off, he was dressed and moved quickly through his breakfast and chores... certainly atypical of this young dwarf.
As several of the other dwarfs and I are sitting at the breakfast table, we realize that suddenly our tongues and our mouths are tasting odd, and that there is an odd, strong, almost sickening odor coming from somewhere in the house. This scent is flavoring what we are eating and drinking as we are inhaling it through out noses...
I hop up from the table and go to the stairs, I call up to Happy, the only dwarf up there, " Hey Happy, you okay??" "Yea mom, I am okay." But his voice is not coming from his room, or his bathroom... so I begin to head up the stairs. As my foot hits the third stair, my nostrils are assaulted by another blast of the smell. Immediately my head starts to hurt, my tongue is thicker and my nose is burning. By the time I reach the landing and call out to Happy again, I feel as if I may pass out.
I figure by following the sounds of humming, that Happy is camped out in my bathroom, and as I round the corner to the master bedroom to the master bath, I run into a fog screen from an aerosol can.
" Happy, have you been spraying your father's Axe body spray?", I ask as I have my face buried into the crook of my arm. "No mom he says." "Really???" , I reply, I can taste it, I am struggling to breathe in this space...I am going to ask you once more and I would like you to tell me the truth."
So, yes indeed I repeat the question. Now perhaps he is not hearing me correctly since now my eyes are watering and my nose and mouth are still buried in the crook of my arm, but would you believe, standing there in the fog of Axe, he continues to deny that he used the Prince's cologne.
Now let me just say right now, I FIRMLY believe that teenage boys should take responsibility for their hygiene. Pit music is a must! and Cologne would be fine, in appropriate doses and with the permission and consent of a parent. Furthermore, I have a big problem with my son's smelling like my husband, that in my mind is just weird...
But I digress, I ask him for the third time to tell me the truth please, as I point out the obvious ways that I KNOW he has illegally used the Prince's body spray, and yes three times is the charm because he says that he did use it. Did I mention that all the while his is nonchalantly combing his hair????
Now here is the quandary - I glance at the clock... it is now time for him to leave for the bus, if he stays to shower this all off, he will miss the bus and be late for school because I will not be able to take him in until the last dwarf gets on the bus at 8:30 .... so ... I have no choice but to send him off in a hurry, now to catch the bus.
Little did I realize that this was the day of the return of his favorite teacher who had been out for a few weeks on leave. Was Happy trying to impress her being a well dressed, groomed and fine smelling young man? We will never know - but I guarantee that day everyone smelled him before they saw him, had to clear their throats in his presence without clearly understanding why, and maybe suffered from a mild headache that cleared once they got out into the fresh air....
This all happened before 7 am ... you just can't make this stuff up!
Thursday, December 29, 2011
This is why I don't foster, I adopt!!
As many fans our our family know, in October in a crazy whirlwind of activity, we added to our dwarfs, a little one, age 10 from Korea. How it happened, I do not know, but somewhere between adjusting to 9 dwarfs in the house, and the news of his impending departure from our home... the little bugger stole my heart. That is right - just wormed his way in there... was it his smile, or his crazy hats? Maybe the way he said that I am the best cooker ever...or the way that he would wait at dinner to start eating until I got my plate of food and sat down... Either way... today reminds me why we do not foster children.
Sticking him in the car today was the HARDEST thing I have done in years... I rest in the knowledge that God is in the details...but I am struggling with understanding what I can not see. What I do see is a boy, who is 10, being moved to a new host home, who is sad and confused. But what I feel is the tug of a mothers heart, having invested hours into his care and comfort. Halloween costumes, Christmas gifts, lost teeth, monkey bread making, tree cutting, bike riding, hours of homework, drilling spelling words, leaf project, flooding of the office from his bath, tucking him in at night, praying with him, shopping for shoes that were not too heavy so he could run faster, his crazy giggle, his love of wrestling with the Prince and the other dwarfs, his concern when I get weepy at church, his love of video games, his persistence in what he wants... our lives were intertwined in such a short time.
As the mom substitute of this little 10 year old, I tried to provide encouragement, settle disputes, comfort him in his sadness, reign him in during times of exuberance... and today, with great pain I said goodbye to him, potentially to not ever hear or see him again. As I walked back to the house today, with tears in my eyes, greeted at the door by many of my dwarfs, my tears became sobs and I clearly now know why we do not foster children, why we adopt...
My little dwarfs unsure of what to do for a sobbing mother, offered me comfort, held my hand and offered me Kleenex and encouragement. As I sit and write this entry, I am binge eating Laughy Taffy (grape of course) and washing it down with a strong diet Pepsi. (extra caffeine and carbonation)
It is my hope that we touched him, the way that he touched us. Are we perfect -NOPE - was he perfect -NOPE - but he was a good fit for our family and he will be missed greatly! you just can't make this stuff up!
Sticking him in the car today was the HARDEST thing I have done in years... I rest in the knowledge that God is in the details...but I am struggling with understanding what I can not see. What I do see is a boy, who is 10, being moved to a new host home, who is sad and confused. But what I feel is the tug of a mothers heart, having invested hours into his care and comfort. Halloween costumes, Christmas gifts, lost teeth, monkey bread making, tree cutting, bike riding, hours of homework, drilling spelling words, leaf project, flooding of the office from his bath, tucking him in at night, praying with him, shopping for shoes that were not too heavy so he could run faster, his crazy giggle, his love of wrestling with the Prince and the other dwarfs, his concern when I get weepy at church, his love of video games, his persistence in what he wants... our lives were intertwined in such a short time.
As the mom substitute of this little 10 year old, I tried to provide encouragement, settle disputes, comfort him in his sadness, reign him in during times of exuberance... and today, with great pain I said goodbye to him, potentially to not ever hear or see him again. As I walked back to the house today, with tears in my eyes, greeted at the door by many of my dwarfs, my tears became sobs and I clearly now know why we do not foster children, why we adopt...
My little dwarfs unsure of what to do for a sobbing mother, offered me comfort, held my hand and offered me Kleenex and encouragement. As I sit and write this entry, I am binge eating Laughy Taffy (grape of course) and washing it down with a strong diet Pepsi. (extra caffeine and carbonation)
It is my hope that we touched him, the way that he touched us. Are we perfect -NOPE - was he perfect -NOPE - but he was a good fit for our family and he will be missed greatly! you just can't make this stuff up!
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