"Your Momma..."

 I know many of you will read this post and will be thinking that Bashful was framed.  He is innocent.... well here is how the story goes, you determine which side of the story you land on at the end of it all.

At 11 AM yesterday my phone rings from the middle school number and I am greeted by the principle's voice on the other end.  "Mrs. Lingle, do you have a moment?"  Well of course I do.  He proceeds to tell me that Bashful is in his office, and that he has been involved in a fight and that he threw the first punch.  "Did I understand that the school has no tolerance for such behavior and that his (the dwarf's punishment) will be three day's out of school suspension." My response is really not one of more than our working out the details of the time off.  As  I wait for Basful to arrive home to tell his side of the story I vacillate between irritation and anger, however not knowing the whole story I try to keep my temper under control. 

As a side note, I think that out of school suspensions are just a big pain in the bum for the parents.  I can't imagine what working parents do... or how other parents deal with three days of "entertaining" their suspended children.  According to Bashful they get to sleep in late and play video games.  At our house an out of school suspension causes much work for the momma, because I refuse to allow the dwarfs to sit and do nothing. There is no sleeping in, no video games...   This is a consequence, and an interruption of my regularly scheduled day, so as the suspended dwarf, you will not be experiencing a vacation.   We have organized PE for 45 minutes, a writing assignment (on the first day it is typically a round of apology letters to the staff and students that had their day interrupted by the shenanigans that sent you to OSS ), math, as well as a list of chores created to suit the "crime".  But I digress... back to the story.

At first Bashful had a mouth full of attitude and sass as he began to tell his tale. I stopped him, and implored of him to lose his attitude, and to consider that a large amount of attitude and sass from him, in the manner that he relayed the story to the Prince and I, would only increase our irritation with him, and cause us to the "throw the book"  at him in regards to his punishment.  At this statement, his eyes got big, and he paused, shaking his head, and asked ..."Why are you going to throw a book at me."  If you do not find the humor in this exchange please refer back to my previous post about life with concrete thinkers!

So it unfolds; as Bashful was working with his reading partner, the class thug reportedly came up to him, and started posturing and trying to interrupt the work that the boys were doing,  All of which Bashful was able to look over and ignore, until in Bashful's words... "He then leaned into my face and said, Your momma is a big fat whale." " Mom, you know I don't play like that, nobody is gonna talk about my momma like that!"    Well there is a shock!  He talks about his momma that way.  However "game on" if someone else repeats what he says. So he stood up and swung, the other boy and he landed on the floor rolling around, and not only was the sheriff called to the room, but the class was disrupted, both boys got suspended and Bashful got rug burn on his arm as a souvenir.   

Now the Prince and I have some conflicting responses on what we would have liked Bashful to do in this situation.  I wish he would have just gotten up and walked back to his seat up front by the teacher so that the thug would stop bugging him.  The Prince's unofficial statement on the situation is stand up for yourself, and if you throw a punch, make it count. Especially if you are going to get three days of out of school suspension. 

I still find it laughable that a dwarf that spends the majority of his day disrespecting his momma, would stand up and get into  a fist fight to defend my honor.   I suppose there is still hope for our relationship!

You really can't make this stuff up!  And to prove it, today during his math lesson I asked him what number was in the middle of number 100 - to which he replied a zero!!  still chuckling here!